Communication

I am in the process of learning American Sign Language (ASL), which is the most commonly used and accepted sign language within the deaf communities in the United States. I learning so much about the language, and I am also learning so much about the deaf culture. First, I have learned that there are many opinions of what is acceptable and which language is to be used. Some people feel that sign language should not ever even be used; others feel that people should go to a school for the deaf and learn how to speak. While some believe in schools for the deaf, others are very much against this because they don't believe that they need to learn how to lip read and speak; instead they should be able to communicate in an alternative way and not feel like they have to conform to some expectation the rest of society has set. It has been really interesting and I am increasingly intrigued by these different opinions and I respect every single one of them, because who is to say that a person's chosen way of communication is "wrong" or "right"? I do not feel like I am someone that gets to make that decision.

Thinking about the various accepted and not accepted ways of communication within the deaf community made me understand the ASL language even more. You see the language is very interesting. It is not like English in the way that there is one sign that may mean a variety of different things, but the way you know the difference is in the body communication (facial expressions, body language). So you really have to watch what the other is trying to communicate to you. In ASL it isn't about an even translation with words, its about the meaning. So if I said something and someone was to translate that into ASL, it could be translated with different signs. So when you sign, you chose signs that best represent what you mean; therefore this could be different between two or more people because they chose to communicate it differently.  I saw perfect examples of this when I looked up the ASL translation of songs and each person I looked at did it differently. None of them are wrong, but they are just finding different ways to communicate the song, because it may have different meaning to each person. 

Communication is such an important thing. It is the way we share stories, feelings, needs, wants, emotions; its how we participate in relationships. Now that I am learning ASL, it is amazing the relationships that are opening up at my work with clients. Not only am I excited that I can understand and communicate with them, but they are so eager to teach and patient because it is such a joy to have someone understand their way of communication. Now all of my clients do not sign nor do they all sign the same, but I am learning by spending time with them what their signs are and I can better understand what their way of communication is. There are clients that communicate in the way that they turn their head, or in sounds they make; but all of this is still communication and it is just as important that I spend time learning their languages too.

People do not communicate in the same way; and just as it is important that I am patient and understanding of someone learning English for the first time, we should also be patient and understanding of someone who signs or other forms of communication. I was surprised at how much I can communicate with someone who communicates by the turning of her head. That may seem small to some, but I have learned she is a beautiful person. 

So what does this mean for congregations out there? I think congregations are called to think out of the box, and think of ways in which we can communicate to the people in the community. How can we include people in worship using different forms of communication? First I understand that not all congregations have a lot of money to spend on elaborate solutions, however it is important that room is made in the budget where you can.  Of course people can bring in translators for worship, but you can also have several printed copies of sermons, messages, passages, etc. available. One can also make sure there are small group or one on one times during scripture lessons (Sunday school). This one on one or small group time gives an opportunity to personally communicate with each other, this gives people more opportunity to share their thoughts. While these are just a few ideas; it is MOST important to ASK the people in your community. This week I will make sure to post some websites that have some ideas and resources. 

Thank you all for reading this week. I welcome any thoughts, or if you have resources please feel free to post. Thank you all so much.

Peace

Images, Language, and Expectations

Throughout history we have developed special terms for persons with disabilities such as "retarded", "different", DISabled, limp, lame,  and even "imperfect" or "unclean". This is just a small example of all the words one could come up with. A youth group I worked with came up with a list of over 50 different terms for persons with disabilities. I am reading Unexpected Guests at God's Banquet: Welcoming People with Disabilities into the Church by Brett Webb-Mitchell. Yes, this book does reflect upon the Christian tradition. However, I encourage people of other faiths to also read this book because it addresses similar issues that can be applied in other faith traditions. Starting in the first chapter it reflects upon how the language for persons with disabilities says a lot in the way we treat, socialize, and minister to people.

Throughout history parents who gave birth to a child with a disability would do one of three things; keep them in their home hidden and deny their existence, abandon them, or have them killed. It was the belief for many that the disabilities were contagious or that these children were corrupted by the devil. The Holocaust was an unbelievably tragic event for millions of people, but did you know that it was persons with disabilities that were the first to be taken away to be murdered, because they were to be considered "unclean". Even today there are countries, including ours (the USA) where parents abandon, hide, and even murder children and adults with disabilities. While this doesn't happen a lot in our country anymore, this is not uncommon in many countries around the world.

I do want to lift up an amazing recent growth in awareness of persons with disabilities and their rights as individuals in society and in congregations, but there is a lot of work to do and it does start with the language. I choose to use "person first language"; which means that I recognize that the individual as a person first and the disability is only secondary, ex: James, who has autism, likes to ride a bike. First he is a person, secondly he HAS a disability (vs. Austisic Jame likes to ride a bike); this helps to emphasize what is more important, that being he is James and not his autism.

Even though I have my preferences, it is important to pay attention to how the individual recognizes and refers to himself/herself. The reason I say this is; it has been my experience that persons with disabilities use differing language depending on the community, culture, age, etc. Just like you and I may use differing language, individuals with disabilities do as well. I knew a woman in seminary who used the term "limp" to describe herself. I would NEVER use this term without her permission or for anyone else. However, this was a term that she grew up with and fit how she saw herself in relation to the world. Be careful though, I would not recommend using words like crippled, limp, retarded, and others that seem controversial, because those terms are overall leaving what is considered socially acceptable.

I know language is a very difficult thing to stay caught up on because language is something that is always changing and adapting. However, a congregation is supposed to be made up of people in the community and therefore needs to adapt and fit the needs of the people in the community. This means learning about how and why these terms are changing, and more importantly what do the individuals with disabilities think about the use of these terms. THIS IS IMPORTANT, ask a variety of people with a variety of disabilities about their opinions. One person does not speak for everyone, and opinions WILL very.

Thank you all for your time. Please give me any of your thoughts. Remember I am only speaking from my experience and speaking to others. I am speaking from my perspective within the Christian tradition in this blog, BUT I would like this to be an open discussion and I welcome any thoughts, reflections, or opinions from people of other faith traditions.

P.S. I will be writing once a week (at least) from now on. I promise.

Blessings and Peace

Greetings

For my first post I will explain a little more about who I am and why the issue of inclusivity of people with disabilities is so important. When I was 5 or 6 I quickly realized I was not like a lot of other kids because I couldn't read and write. I was diagnosed with a variety of learning disabilities; while the diagnosis is supposed to help teachers know how to teach me, teachers got in the habit of passing me from one grade to the next. They did this sometimes with little to no effort and a lack of respect, other teachers simply didn't know hot to teach me. Because the teachers didn't respect me, the children didn't respect me. So school was not a place that I felt welcome, but church was a place where I felt like I could go and be myself. Even though I struggled to be included with children my own age at church, the congregation as a whole was supportive and cheering me on.

After going to a private school and learning more about how I learn and what works best for me, I went back to public school and graduated from high school and then college. Through all of this time my congregation was rooting for me. What changed my life was working with adults and children with disabilities while working at a YMCA. I had always been an advocate for people with disabilities, partly because I was a self advocate and resonated with them. But when I heard stories from the children and adults with disabilities and parents of persons with disabilities, I was shocked to find out that churches, temples, synagogues, etc. were asking people to leave because they were being "disruptive",  "too loud, " "distracting",  or "there is no place for you/them". Hearing this was like a shot to the heart; I couldn't believe that congregations (no matter what the religion) were shutting people out.

I had been planning on going to seminary, because I was interested to go into the ministry. After hearing this it was as if the stories came streaming in. I started hearing of so many people who were not being welcomed into their congregations. So as I went into seminary, it started to become clear that God was calling me to advocate for people with disabilities in congregations. This blog is not about me, but it is about how congregations of all faiths are called to welcome everyone and provide a place ALONG SIDE one another. I am not accusing anyone or any particular faith; instead I understand that it is hard to include people who may have different needs and abilities than we are used to. It was only in 1990 when schools had to integrate persons with disabilities in the schools. Throughout history persons with disabilities have been considered the lowest/least respected members of society. it is my understanding that this lack of inclusivity is because there is a lack of understanding and knowledge, understanding, and socialization of persons with disabilities. I look forward to our conversations in the future.

Peace and Blessings.